Top 10 Worst Movies

1.  Blues Brothers 2000.  Just why did this movie get made anyway?  The original Blues Brothers was fine as is,  it didn't need a sequel AT ALL.  What happened to Jake and Elwood after the events of the first movie is up to interpretation if you ask me.   But in this so called 'sequel' it is flat out said that Jake and Curtis BOTH died -  with little to no explanation.   My theory is that Jake died of a drug overdose like his actor John Belushi and Curtis died of old age,  although my friend Nikon-Ninja helped make those theories.  Also...Buster Blues or as I call him 'Buster the Brat',  who's idea was it to throw in a little kid?  Also...don't get me started on that Big Lipped Aligator Moment involving Queen Mousette.  Really?  A Voodoo queen who turns people into zombies,  mice and statues?   Dude,  the Blues Brothers is set in Chicago -  A REAL city,  magical or supernatural elements do NOT belong in a movie set in a real town,   yes -  there are Disney movies that have done this but there it's acceptable causes it's Disney.   Oh,  and Queen Mousette -  Doctor Facilier called,  he wants his 'voodoo master' schtick back.
2.  North.  I believe the late great Roger Ebert said all that needs to be said about this movie.
3.  Arthur -  2011.  Okay...whose idea was it to remake the 1981 classic that starred Dudley Moore and have Mr Russell "I'm Quirky and I come from Essex so everyone must worship me" Brand in the lead role?  Remember his role as Aldous Snow in Forgetting Sarah Marshall and how charming he was in that?  I do.  Remember how some people hated Get Him To The Greek?  I certainly do,  now I didn't hate that movie - I liked it,  it's just well...it was the year after that this movie came out and well....it's not bad,  i'm just saying that...oh for Celestia's sake -  it's just that Brand only plays an exaggerated version of himself in the former -  to the point I literally referred to it as Russell Brand as Russell Brand in Russell Brand:  The Movie.    And he sort of does the same thing here,  only he's trying to be like Dudley Moore in the original movie.   Dudley's version of Arthur -  was charming and funny,   Russell's version just makes Arthur come across as either a Ditz or an immature brat.  What makes it worse for me is that when he meets up with Naomi who is giving a tour, he lies to the police officer about it -  claiming to be her 'fiancee'.   And yet Naomi totally buys it?  I'm sorry but there's no way she'd be dumb enough to buy that excuse.  Oh...and might I add that he's doing this just because he doesn't want to marry Susan? *insert Picard facepalm clip here* The only thing that saved it for me was Helen Mirren.   And there are some sick people who actually LIKE Brand?  I'm sorry...but can someone please tell me why this loser has 'fan-girls'?  Is it like Justin Beiber where the majority of his fans are rabid teenage girls?  I'd rather date Angela from Night Of The Demons than be anywhere near him.
4.  Beauty And The Beast: Enchanted Christmas.   While Beast and Belle aren't my favorite Disney couple,  I don't like how they were downplayed here.  The only thing that saved this movie was Tim Curry as the voice of Forte.
5.  Wired.  Want to know how to make a good biopic?  Watch Walk The Line,  Hoffa or Man On The Moon.  Want to know how to make an awful one?  Watch THIS atrocity.  Based on the also awful book of the same name,  this movie is supposed to be a biopic about Belushi but instead it's a feature length PSA about the 'evils' of drug use.   We get it,  he died of a drug overdose.   You don't need to keep hammering it  in like that.   Also,  what's with the obvious It's A Wonderful Knockoff plot involving the guardian angel and the obvious rip-off of the Bill Murray movie Scrooged?   Luckily there's still hope for the new Belushi biopic in the works.  Might I suggest Jorge Garcia as John Belushi?    Lastly...I swear if those greedy bastards at Hollywood ever get the idea to do a 'Wired' style biopic about either John Candy,  George Carlin,  Rodney Dangerfield,  or Robin Williams -  I'll make sure to make their lives a living hell.
6.  The Human Centipede/The Human Centipede 2.   WHHHHY?  This movie is so sick and disgusting and so is its sequel.  In fact,  the Human Centipede 2 is the other movie Roger Ebert had strong feelings of hate towards.   The fact someone actually did fanfics of this movie makes it even worse (Google "Love At First Bite Human Centipede").   Where the hell is Dexter Morgan when you need him?
7.  Warm Bodies.   I don't think there is anything wrong with Beauty And The Beast type stories,  but still Warm Bodies rubs me the wrong way because it is just a rehash of Twilight with elements of Bicentennial Man thrown in.   Mainly the whole 'non-human character who wants to be human' thing.  Plus,  it kind of promotes necrophilia.  If you want a movie that has a 'sexy' zombie in it,  watch Return Of The Living Dead -  trust me,  Linnea Quiggley is the only 'sexy' zombie you'll ever need -  well,  her and Melinda Clarke as Julie in Return Of The Living Dead III.
8.  Twilight franchise.   It's Twilight - nuff said.
9.  Fright Night 2011.   It's okay for a horror remake but I still don't think it needed to be made.  I have nothing against David Tennant, but....his portrayal of Peter Vincent was too...Russell Brand-like with a sprinkle of Criss Angel.   When I hear the name 'Peter Vincent', I think of Roddy McDowell in the original and I certainly do NOT think of a 'Russell Brand Impersonator'.   Also Collin Farrell is okay as Jerry but he's not as menacing or charismatic as Chris Sarandon was in the original.  In the original  Chris Sarandon was not only threatening as Jerry but also very charming and he came across as a very nice man despite being a vampire.   Collin's version may as well just wear a shirt that says...."Yeah,  like i'm totally the villain" on the front because it was way too obvious,  with Chris Sarandon - it came as a shocking surprise that he was indeed a vampire because he was so nice and polite.
10.  Master Of Disguise.  There was a time in which I actually liked this movie,  but mostly because of the soundtrack.